It's really good and powerful, just one small thing...it would be better if you chaned 'His secret daughter can't help but smile.' to 'She can't help but smile.' I think the reader understands who she is at the same moment he does and so that last line feels redundant...to me anyway.
Well done, though!
Author's Response: And I have changed the last line! Thank so much for the help!
Reviews For Flowers and Cards
Reviewer: enodemon (Anonymous)
09 Jun 2007 7:08 am