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Reviewer: Alex (Anonymous)
28 Aug 2005 12:23 am
I really like the way you have captured the angst in John and Rodney because, well, damnit, I wanted more from the actual show! You've done a great job here and I hope you write more (and soon). :D

Author's Response: I wanted more too. I was very unhappy with the way that it just sorta of ended...which is happening an awful lot this season. Thanks!
…one misstep and you could fall
Reviewer: Lee Michelle (Anonymous)
28 Aug 2005 12:18 am
Very good, I'm liking this a lot, please write some more.

Author's Response: Thank you very much. More is on its way.
…one misstep and you could fall
Reviewer: Elisa (Anonymous)
26 Aug 2005 6:44 pm
So, this means that Rodney is not going to jump?! Hopefully!! Hurry with the next chapter, have to see what happens next!! Hey, this is really good!!

Author's Response: Thank you! I'm hurrying, I swear. Rodney and John are still haveing a confab on what they think needs to be said in the chapter...and that does sound as nuts as I think, right?
walking the razor's edge...
Reviewer: fanficaddict (Anonymous)
26 Aug 2005 10:09 am
*whew* Glad he's not going to jump, very sad reason though. Even though he believes he lost all their friendship, he's going to be unselfish and stick around so he can help them the only way he can. *g* love it! I'm sure it didn't look like he changed his mind from John's pov :O Loved Daniel's advice *huggles* this is great! More please!

Author's Response: Thank you! Daniel just keeps showing up and I'm not precisely certain why...I can just see Daniel spending time with Rodney in Antartica while Jack is frozen and during the gear-up time during and prior to Rising. They are such similiar characters [excluding social skills]...I sometimes wonder what made Daniel become as strong as he his...willing to be publically, potentially very wrong...and what made Rodney into someone who hids his stregnth and bravery...who made him think that he isn't worth even being in existance that he compensates with bravado and hypercondria...maybe it has to do with pianos...Daniel has one and Rodney doesn't. Odd.
walking the razor's edge...
Reviewer: Laura_trekkie (Signed)
26 Aug 2005 7:43 am
Oh thank heavens. I was hugely worried at the end of chapter two, when John saw Rodney looking ready to jump. I'm very relieved to see that he has no intention of doing so. I'm both proud and sad at his resolve to carry on regardless of his loss of Elizabeth, Radek and John...but I can't wait to see what John's going to say. I don't think he's as lost as Rodney thinks. Laura.

Author's Response: There's something noble in continuing on when you're needed and not giving in to despair even though you still carry it with you...difficult and strong and noble. It's seems to be more about self-sacrifice and not really caring if you are lost..."we're lost in the trees, but he likes to be there" [bad paraphrase of Firefly]...because even if you're lost, it's by choice and you can lead others out...I'm not certain that made sense, but--yeah.
walking the razor's edge...
Reviewer: springwoof (Signed)
25 Aug 2005 10:16 pm
Ack! Cliffhanger-itis! I saw you're writing another chapter--hurry! hurry! very moving story about a very fraught episode. can't wait to see more...wags, springwoof

Author's Response: The third should be up tonight(?), I hope. Thank you for the wags. ;]
...haunting
Reviewer: Laura_trekkie (Signed)
25 Aug 2005 9:31 pm
This is a great look at John's internal conflict; wanting to be angry at Rodney for his giant mistake, but not being able to do it with the image of Rodney's eyes in his mind. I was intrigued by the panic John felt not being his, and the fact that Atlantis guided him where he needed to be. And *eep* Rodney :(. I'm glad John's in time to talk him down...he is, right? ::is on edge of seat::. Laura.

Author's Response: Thanks. I'm intrigued by the panic too. And with John and the balcony and Rodney, I swear that the chapter is coming up.
...haunting
Reviewer: fanficaddict (Anonymous)
25 Aug 2005 10:52 am
Eeeeek! Ack! No! You can't stop there! *gasp* Very well written, you really nailed John's pov pertaining to the ep, excellent! More please!

Author's Response: Thanks! I'm working on it, I swear. *scribbles furiously*
...haunting
Reviewer: Puppet (Anonymous)
25 Aug 2005 5:58 am
I've often wanted to give an indebt review on stories here on WB, but in the past I've felt clumsy about summing up how well I thought an author had done. So I've kept my kudos short and sweet. But I had to make an attempt here given that I feel my favorite character was treated terribly in the actual related episode your story is based on. And after reading some fan responses about "Trinity" on GW, I'm SOOOO glad to read something (if only fanfic) that shows more than an inkling of understanding for Rodney and what he was doing. (That is, other than strictly relationship support in slashfic and shipfic.) First off, you did so well in your first chapter by giving us a glimpse of Mckay's inner turmoil over his actions. It seems some viewers didn't feel that Mckay had any true remorse; I guess at first glance at his behavior one might think so if one didn't like or know the character well. You continue to address this misconception about how he truly felt perfectly in chapter two when "your" Sheppard thoroughly analyzes Rodney's eyes and not just how and what he's saying. You might not be going the way I hope by the end of this story, but I thought I'd never see anything to suggest the blame and guilt be shared for what happened. (Given the overwhelming thumbs up that most people were giving the show's writers for crashing Mckay's world down around his ears.) I personally think it would have been more consistent with what we've seen so far between characters if SOMEONE would have stepped in and talked to Rodney (personally, not just professionally) and stopped him before it got anywhere NEAR the outcome of the episode. I also didn't think the idea would ever be addressed in a general category fan fiction of how friends let him down as badly as he screwed up. You addressed this partly by replaying in Sheppard's head the last scene in the episode between him and Rodney by the transport elevator. I get the hint that you may think, as I do, that what Sheppard said last was NOT the most charitable statement (as many fans on GW seemed to have thought) given the moment. Also in my reading of your scene, I kinda thought you were seeing the same Rodney Mckay I was. The highly vulnerable Rodney Mckay, squirming as he sat in front of Sam Carter in "Redemption", (the infirmary scene) making a rare desperate attempt at explaining himself and "bonding" with someone he respected. He even came complete with forced smiles and bad jokes! If Sheppard's character is to be considered a friend and not just a "teammate", he could have come up with something better than the episode’s almost smug last line. Mckay's character on the show is flawed terribly by his arrogance, and in this case he was completely blinded by it. "Trinity" was the episode that should prove to Rodney Mckay that he can't always be right. However in trying to push that so hard, it also made it seem as thought the personal friendship he seems to have with Sheppard's character (and others) isn't really all there. That there is only professional companionship between characters and nothing more. (And if he was bound to screw up anyway as character and show development, I could totally see Rodney in this episode sneaking off anyway after people at least tried to talk him out of going back, having stuck to their guns on the matter saying " No, Rodney, we're not going back--it's over.".) And the real episode went too far out without bringing it back full circle to the fact that this wasn't the first big mistake that someone has made since the expedition set foot on Atlantis. You also give pause to that idea in the second chapter where Sheppard reflects on his own past actions. It was beautiful that you had him voice the idea that someone should now, (given the actual events that lead up to your story) go talk to Rodney, given their failure as friends to do so before. I also appreciated how you quickly thereafter give Sheppard the epiphany that the events, circumstances, and lack of understanding might cause Rodney to do something off balance. I honestly think that what you've wrote in places so far is like the missing scene(s)/line(s) that real show should've included. I could be totally wrong in my reading of your work. “Your" Sheppard's seemingly shared guilt and reactions in the second chapter could wind up coming back to him being royally, unquestioningly pissed at Rodney. But I'm so HAPPY that you even gave a nod in these first two chapters toward the idea that it wasn't just ALL RODNEY'S AMBITION CRAZED FAULT, that I could ****....scream! :) P.S. Sometimes I think a few of the writers here should be working for the show! People here seem to have much more a handle on showing the emotional impact that we should see on the show more often. You all do a great job filling in those gaps left by the actual writers.

Author's Response: I think that you may have hit it dead-on. This wasn't the actions of the people that we've come to know, understand, and care for over the last session. And they're not being the people that they know either. It's as if having contact with Earth again has skewed them...which it probably would have in reality. But Rodney's reaction at the end of Trinity is so exactly the Rodney of Stargate--all crooked smirks, bad jokes, and uncomfortable gestures. So certain that anything he thought he had had was gone...And when has Rodney ever done more than make pity-snarky comments when told "no" in a way that it was meant as the complete and utter end? This was an episode that Elizabeth, John, Radek, Carson...someone, needed to take him aside and say that sometimes a person's death has to be left as merely a death and not have some greater meaning...Okay, blurble-rant done. Thank you so much for your review and support and feedback and, just, wow. I hope to continue to write-up to par.
...haunting
Reviewer: Texan Elf (Anonymous)
25 Aug 2005 12:54 am
After the first part I certainly felt for Rodney and in this one....ooh, great cliffhanger *sorry for the pun* I can't wait to see what happens next!

Author's Response: Thank you.
...haunting
Reviewer: Elisa (Anonymous)
24 Aug 2005 11:48 pm
Ah, no fair leaving us hanging on the edge like that!!! Really great story!! Please update and soon!! I am having difficulty waiting!! Poor Rodney!!

Author's Response: The next chapter's in progress...'bout halfway written. Thank you for the praise and I so agree with the poor Rodney statement.
...haunting
Reviewer: Laura_trekkie (Signed)
20 Aug 2005 8:42 pm
Poor Rodney :(. I liked the Daniel bit, it sounded like something he would say, and it obviously was something Rodney could relate to. As for his worries about having lost John's trust for good, I'd like to hope that he's simply overreacting in typical McKay fashion, and John will prove him wrong. This is great for a first attempt, keep it up. Laura.

Author's Response: Thanks you muchly! I really hope that Rodney is overreacting as well. From the expression on John's face, I'd say that it wouldn't be that hard for Rodney to get back into good-staniding in John's eyes. Unfortunately, I'm not certain that Rodney would ever be able to allow himself to see that forgiveness. He certainly seems to carry the weight of the other deaths that he feels he should have been able to prevent...his little speech about the guy, whose name I have just lost, who spent the last 30 days of his life figuring out what he had done to eradiate himself so that no one would ever have to experience it again. So that the lose of his life wasn't a waste. I think that may have been what made this come out.
another mistake...
Reviewer: Miso no Tsuki (Signed)
20 Aug 2005 8:09 pm
Really good for a first try, keep going. :)

Author's Response: Thanks! I really kinda thought this was a one-off, but I liked writing it and I've liked having people respond. Ya never know, I may become a fanfic writer yet.
another mistake...
Reviewer: fanficaddict (Anonymous)
20 Aug 2005 1:22 pm
Poor Rodney *huggles* great fic!

Author's Response: Thank you so much!
another mistake...
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