Reviews For Girlfriend

You must login (register) to review.

Reviewer: Mystic (Signed)
30 Jan 2009 8:28 pm
Overall an engaging story, though I skipped the het aspect as I prefere slash (Mcshep) As for t he story, Catherine=Marysue. She was perfect in every way and no one but Mary Sue like characters are like that. It's the flaws that make them enderring, so by the end I stopped liking her. Character speach was a problem, you had too many characters using the same slang 'man' in too many sentences and you totally missed Rodney's voice 85% of the time. He's a hard character to pin down, but smooth and elequent is never it. Things to work on. Plot, a good detailed ideal, but you rushed a lot of it and again the MarySue character wins the day. I'm not trying to be harsh, just point out some major issues that needed work. If I had not liked it overall I wouldn't have bothered finishing it or cared enough to mention the problems.

Author's Response: Thanks for taking the time to read the story. I feel you're correct about the plot being rushed, but I had to make some editing decisions about it. I've thought about revising some of the story, but I'm afraid it would be WAY too long for a forum such as Wraithbait. I actually have a significant chunk of material I edited out to keep the story from being too long. I thought your comments about Catherine = Mary Sue and Rodney's speech were interesting, as I've had other comments that felt the opposite was true. I appreciate your feedback.
Reviewer: cookiemom6067 (Signed)
24 Apr 2008 7:18 pm
I'm in the middle of reading this through for the second time in 2 days. I stumbled on it looking for a different story with the same title, and I'm so glad I did. You did a really nice job with Catherine - fandom can be a hyper-critical place for an orignal character, particularly for one getting in the middle of a popular pairing like John/Rodney. Kudos for writing a character that McSheppers like me can really like. Even MORE kudos for having Catherine take care of the rapist herself, instead of being a damsel in distress. As a mother of a daughter, I appreciate any strong female characters I find. I also really liked her integrity about not getting in the middle of their relationship uninvited and for understanding (until things changed) that she did not have a claim on John. I also really appreciated that Catherine so thoroughly owned her own sexuality and had standards for men that wanted to share her bed. The only bit that did not "ring" for me was the supremely short refractory periods evident for John and Rodney, but that's really just a quibble.

Author's Response: I have a daughter, too. Damsels in distress really bug me, too. And as for our intrepid heroes, well, they are supermen, aren't they? Thanks so much for taking time to read and write a review. I'm sorry it's taken so long to say thanks, but real life has been much busier than I like for the past few months. Thanks again!
Reviewer: Aligewe (Anonymous)
16 Mar 2007 2:32 pm
WOW!!!! really nice story!!!! i just thought the ending was a little abrubt... kinda sudden... but other than that really different!!! (at least for me... I haven't found anything like this before... haven't looked into the Sheppard/McKay realm yet first story I read) so REALLY REALLY GREAT!!!!

Author's Response: Thank you so much! I did write more between the end of stalker guy and John's retirement, but I was afraid they dragged a bit too much. It's really nice of you to take the time to read and write a review of my story. I appreciate your kind words!
Reviewer: mjmcca (Signed)
06 Feb 2007 1:42 am
well done

Author's Response: Thank you so much for reading and taking the time to write a review. I appreciate your kind words!
Reviewer: queixo (Anonymous)
25 Nov 2006 8:22 pm
very perfectly sappy and fun story. i so liked the interaction and the way u made the 3some not be contrived. it so worked esp with her being able to read them so well and being so accomplished on her own. way, way cool.

Author's Response: Thank you so much for taking the time to read my story and leave a review. I'm glad you liked it!
Reviewer: Vesica (Signed)
19 Nov 2006 9:59 pm
*wibbles* This was the perfect ending to this story!! Nice character development and a very natural feeling journey from start to finish. Also, the little Weir/Zelenka ref and Sam/Jack ref made me giggle. Excellent story and again - wow, I never thought I would love an original character as much as I've loved this! ~Ves

Author's Response: Thank you so much, Ves. I'm so pleased you liked it. I kind of miss them now that this is finished. I appreciate you taking the time to read and leave feedback.
Reviewer: Vesica (Signed)
19 Nov 2006 9:34 pm
I have gotten too spoiled with sites that do automatic notification of new chapters. Better late than never though. Ugh - what a way to resolve that. Poor Cath. And now I am dying to know just where the boyos are. ~Ves

Author's Response: Sorry you didn't find this immediately! I can't get my stuff up anywhere else, or I would post to an auto-update site. I'm very grateful you took the time to read, and very very pleased that you liked it! THANKS!!
Reviewer: Mel (Anonymous)
12 Nov 2006 8:54 am
Well dear author...never thought I'd like a Mary Sue, but hey there's a first for everything...thanks for the smile.

Author's Response: Thank you! I tried to make her very un-Mary Sue-ish, and I'm glad I succeeded for you. Thanks for reading!
Reviewer: Laura_trekkie (Signed)
12 Nov 2006 12:16 am
Excellent ending. Each event adding to the over all happiness of the three, even with the sad instances like Aunt Lucille dying and John having to retire and give up flying. I loved John's retirement party for the opportunity it gave to catch up with everyone, both the new and old faces, even people such as Ritter and Johnson, though I liked catching up with the Atlantis faces who had been pretty absent for the rest of the story. I also liked that they named their sons Peter and Aiden. What a great memorial to those two lost friends. I loved that they'd been granted clearance to tell Cath everything and I loved it even more that they were going back to Atlantis for a visit. A happy ending :). Laura.

Author's Response: Thank you, Laura. I'm so pleased you liked the story, and actually read it all the way through! Thank you VERY much for reading and commenting!
Reviewer: Laura_trekkie (Signed)
11 Nov 2006 11:45 pm
Oh Cath. It's plain, and understandable, that she was feeling emotionally drained, but it's such a shame that she up and left and caused the extra worry and heartache. And all because some idiot forgot to call the ADA's office :(. I'm glad they're all back together again now and that Cath's calmed down and realised she wasn't abandoned. Laura.

Author's Response: Had to get in that last plot twist! Thanks for reading.
Reviewer: Laura_trekkie (Signed)
11 Nov 2006 11:30 pm
Great chapter. I liked how everyone knew that Cath had acted in self-defence and treated her accordingly even as they followed the procedures. It was also good to hear that stalker-guy was spilling his guts. But what happened to Rodney? And does John know what's going on? Laura.

Author's Response: One of my friend's husband is a cop. So, I checked with him about the procedures. Thanks, Laura. I'm glad you liked the chapter, and thanks for reading.
Reviewer: KateCayce (Signed)
11 Nov 2006 10:24 pm
Awesome story! I loved that they named their kids after Grodin and Ford.

Author's Response: Thank you so much! I'm glad you liked it, and I'm grateful that you took the time to comment. Thanks for reading!
Reviewer: A Cat Called McKay (Anonymous)
09 Nov 2006 9:58 pm
good stuff glad youv added more

Author's Response: Thank you! I am so glad you enjoyed it, and thanks so much for reading!
Reviewer: katygrl (Anonymous)
07 Nov 2006 9:22 pm
I really like this! I hope that you update soon, I want to see what happens next!

Author's Response: It's written, but I need to finish editing it. I'm trying to hurry (I promise!), but real life has been particularly insistent lately. THANK YOU so much for reading and posting a comment!!!
Reviewer: Vesica (Signed)
02 Nov 2006 10:52 pm
AHHH!! After an hour and a half of solid reading, I can't believe I have to wait to find out what happens next!! Fantastic - as always. I couldn't stop reading long enough to review, but here I am now. Wonderful!! ~Ves

Author's Response: Thank you! I'm editing chapter fourteen now. I want to get it right, since you've all been so patient and kind. Make sure you get your money's worth, as it is. Thanks for reading.
Reviewer: Vesica (Signed)
02 Nov 2006 10:14 pm
Okay not an AU. Love the conversation with Ronon...just perfect. All monosyllablic words and glares. Still loving this one...Damn, but you can write. ~Ves

Author's Response: Can't you just see Ronon shoveling down those eggs, looking at her the way he looked at Sheppard in Runner? I'm glad you liked it--THANKS so much for reading. Your kind words really mean a lot to me.
Reviewer: Vesica (Signed)
02 Nov 2006 10:01 pm
Well, now you know what I am doing with my evening...reading straight through nearly everything you've written. Love how true these characters are to canon while still being fairly AU. Fun read and I had to stop devouring the prose long enough to say I nearly died laughing at the mental image of Rodney having shopgirls running about in a panic selecting clothing. Very nicely done - as I am coming to expect from you! ~Ves

Author's Response: Rodney visits Target (or Marks & Spencers), snapping those fingers! That was too irresistible to pass up. I'm glad you liked it!
Reviewer: Emma (Anonymous)
31 Oct 2006 3:09 am
I'm enjoying the story so far. Looking forward to the final chapter(s).

Author's Response: Thanks, Emma! I hope to finish this up soon.
Reviewer: Donna (Anonymous)
28 Oct 2006 6:38 pm
When is the next part pleaseeeeeeeeee.

Author's Response: I'm working on it. {grin} Real life has been more insistent lately, but I'll try to hurry.
Reviewer: duff (Anonymous)
17 Oct 2006 12:34 am
Nice cliffie.

Author's Response: Thank you! I hope you like the denouement as well!