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Penname: Ciar [Contact]
Real name: Member Since: 18 Dec 2007
Membership status: Member
I love McShep fic, in particular first time stories, angsty stories with a happy ending, romantic stories with drama and a happy ending, adventure stories with a happy ending (notice a bit of a pattern there as regards endings?? *g*). Basically I prefer to read stories where John and Rodney gradually realise how they feel about each other, become an item, and are ultimately happy that they're together (trials and tribulations thrown into the mix, to strengthen their feelings for each other, is great too).

I'm relatively new to slash fic, and as of late 2007 I decided to try my hand at writing slash, unfortunately I'm not the fastest writer in the world :(

ETA: From 2008-2013 I had to take a break from fandom for RL reasons but I'm back now and hoping to write again soon.
Beta-reader: Yes
Reviews by Ciar

Summary: What would Elizabeth Weir do if she was abandoned? Anything she had to...

Categories: General
Characters: Carson Beckett, Elizabeth Weir, John Sheppard, Original Character, Radek Zelenka, Rodney McKay
Genres: Action/Adventure
Warnings: Character death
Chapters: 1 [Table of Contents]
Series: None

Word count: 6750; Completed: Yes
Updated: 16 Jul 2005; Published: 16 Jul 2005
Reviewer: Ciar (Signed)
07 Sep 2008
Just found this today and wanted to let you know that I really enjoyed it. It was very intriguing and well written. It gives such interesting hints of how things could go in the world you've built. It's so weird to see the familiar characters in such a different light and yet you've kept the essence of each one, they're still true to their essential natures.

Author's Response: Thank you so much for the lovely feedback! It\'s wonderful that folks are still finding this story and enjoying it. And I see that you\'ve read and reviewed The Body Holographic as well, so doubly thanks for your thoughtful and very kind comments. wags, springwoof
Chapter 1: Left to Fend

Summary: "I would give anything for you to be real." (A "Left to Fend" Remix)

Updated: 07 Jul 2006; Published: 07 Jul 2006
Reviewer: Ciar (Signed)
07 Sep 2008
I've just finished reading this and I really want you to know that the story gave me goosebumps, as well as moments of both hope and despair - seriously, I was all over the place emotionally as I read my way through this.

I was so angry at times with the way that the characters behaved and sometimes I really wanted to throttle them (in particular Rodney). As I read on, I got less angry and realised why they were they way they were, but it was still sad to see them living lives that they would never have chosen for themselves.

It was a great roller coaster ride of a story and I really couldn't guess what was coming next.

Even though I found it hard to cope with, I think that in the end I'm glad that you gave us the sadness/angst but also managed to temper it with the softer scenes that served as a constant reminder of how much John and Rodney loved each other. I was so surprised, and incredibly relieved, to get a happy(ish) ending.

This story was a true testament to enduring love between Rodney and John - it was just hard to join them on their journey towards a happy but also heartbreaking ending.

Author's Response: Thank you so much for that enthusiastic and thoughtful review, Ciar. I remember distinctly how hard SpringWoof and I worked at the structure of this story, from the point that we decided that it shouldn\'t be told chronologically to working out what scenes should go where. It means a great deal to read reviews like yours and know the kind of impact it had. It was also extremely important to us to give the readers not only some kind of closure, but also to give hope, and as happy an ending as possible after so many decades of sorrow for both men. I am so pleased that the story meant so much to you, and I appreciate your words immensely. Thank you again. Leah
Chapter 1: One of One

Summary: Sheppard calls Rodney. A lot. Spoilers for "The Return I" and "Phantoms."

Categories: Slash Pairings > McKay/Sheppard
Characters: John Sheppard, Rodney McKay
Genres: Challenge, Episode Related, Humour, Pre-slash
Warnings: None
Chapters: 1 [Table of Contents]
Series: None

Word count: 1532; Completed: Yes
Updated: 18 Oct 2006; Published: 17 Oct 2006
Reviewer: Ciar (Signed)
04 Mar 2008
Oh I love this fic; such a good characterisation of Rodney and John. I can absolutely imagine this all really happening in between the gaps in Canon. :D
Chapter 1: Fin
Rising Above by Susan [NC-17]

Summary: Evil!Sheppard in a parallel universe. Poor Dr. McKay with a family to feed.

Dr. Rodney McKay must balance his family life with his passionate and yet cold commander at Stargate Command, Colonel John Sheppard.

Het McKay/Brown and McKay/Carter. Non-consensual Sheppard/McKay, Lorne/Chuck, and mention of non-consensual Kowalski/Other male, Jackson/Other female, and O'Neill/Carter.


Updated: 12 Jul 2012; Published: 14 Nov 2006
Reviewer: Ciar (Signed)
28 Dec 2007
Ooooh, I get to read the final version, yay!

I love this!!!

The small touches you added give it such a sense of detail and make it feel so atmospheric:

This bit - "His thumbs caressed the hollows between the tendons at the base of Rodney's thighs," and also your having John whimpering into Rodney's mouth because he's so turned on. Those small details just blew me away :)

I like this domineering, possessive, kinky Sheppard and I can't wait to see what else he has in store for poor Rodney.

Author's Response: Indeed your feedback helped most of my ideas grow. It is difficult for me to keep an interest in a chapter, or story for that matter, and your excitement over this chapter, helped keep my creative juices flowing. God, that is disgusting.
Chapter 19: Love?

Summary: The senior staff are putting on a show. Warning: British Christmas traditions ahead.

Categories: General
Characters: Carson Beckett, Elizabeth Weir, John Sheppard, Major Lorne, Rodney McKay, Ronon Dex, Teyla Emmagan
Genres: Humour
Warnings: None
Chapters: 2 [Table of Contents]
Series: None

Word count: 2499; Completed: Yes
Updated: 01 Jan 2008; Published: 07 Jan 2007
Reviewer: Ciar (Signed)
02 Jan 2008
Brilliant idea to have Atlantis stage a Panto! I had no idea that Americans didn't have Pantos at Xmas. Carson will show them what they've been missing out on... oh no he won't!.... oh yes he will! Sorry couldn't help myself from getting into the Panto spirit LOL

Author's Response: Let the panto spirit out!\r\n\r\nGlad you liked it. :D
Chapter 1: 1
Reviewer: Ciar (Signed)
04 Jan 2008
This chapter was absolutely hilarious, I split my sides laughing. Ronon's sadness at his lack of cleavage was soooo funny.

Author's Response: Glad it hit the right spot. :D
Chapter 2: Chapter 2
Bereft by kashkow [PG-13]
[Reviews - 8]

Summary: Once again an ancient device causes trouble for John Sheppard.

Categories: General
Characters: Carson Beckett
Genres: Angst
Warnings: None
Chapters: 1 [Table of Contents]
Series: None

Word count: 37898; Completed: Yes
Updated: 17 Apr 2007; Published: 14 Apr 2007
Reviewer: Ciar (Signed)
09 Jan 2008
That was an absolutely lovely read. What a well written character exploration of Sheppard, I feel I understand the character a bit better since reading your story. When Rodney realised that he would be the person the device used to break Sheppard, I felt so sorry for him and for Sheppard too because I knew that Rodney being horrible to John would be too much for him to bear.



Thankfully things improved in the end for poor Sheppard and McKay.
Chapter 1: Complete

Summary: AU from the end of Conversion. Sheppard doesn't get immediately cured and even when he does, still has some of the abilities he had acquired. He's also still blue. How does this impact Atlantis and the events that follow?

Categories: Slash Pairings > McKay/Sheppard
Characters: Carson Beckett, Elizabeth Weir, Major Lorne, Radek Zelenka, Ronon Dex, Teyla Emmagan
Genres: AU - Alternate Universe, Pre-slash
Warnings: None
Chapters: 6 [Table of Contents]
Series: None

Word count: 32965; Completed: No
Updated: 03 Apr 2008; Published: 30 Jun 2007
Reviewer: Ciar (Signed)
17 Jan 2008
I really enjoyed reading this - I like reading angsty, troubled John. I loved how primal and possessive John was of Rodney when we saw them together in the brig. It's great that Rodney is the one person who is really able to understand John and is able to help him emotionally and physically. I think you do a great job of getting across their trust and acceptance of each other. I can't wait to read more and to see what John is capable of with his altered body. I really enjoy the conversations Rodney and John have together too, they're so well written. More chapters please, whenever you can manage it :D
Chapter 5: Chapter 5

Summary: The chronicles of the galaxy's elder civilizations rate the Idiran-Culture war as the most significant conflict of the past fifty thousand years, and one of those singularly interesting Events they see so rarely these days. For the first several years of the war, the Culture largely fought using its General Contact Units, with the explorers gradually being sent to less important theaters as true warships became available.

Categories: Slash Pairings > McKay/Sheppard
Characters: John Sheppard, Rodney McKay, Ronon Dex, Teyla Emmagan
Genres: Challenge, First Time, Friendship, Humour
Warnings: None
Chapters: 1 [Table of Contents]
Series: None

Word count: 2453; Completed: Yes
Updated: 07 Sep 2007; Published: 04 Sep 2007
Reviewer: Ciar (Signed)
12 Jan 2008
OMG this is wonderful!!! I LOVE the Culture novels and their eccentric drones and ships, so to have the SGA characters written as Culture ships is just perfect. Plus you wrote it as McShep - which is just the absolute icing on the cake. You did such a great job of fusing the elements of both 'verses together. Please can we have some more?? Pretty please??

Author's Response: Heh, I\'m glad there\'s someone else around here who\'s actually read them. Maybe I\'ll find some way to write more, I\'ve got several other things I\'m juggling.
Chapter 1: Chapter 1

Summary: Fix-it for "Sunday" with a McShep twist. Carson encourages Rodney to think about why he spends more time with Sheppard than with Katie Brown.

Categories: Ship Pairings > Beckett/Teyla Emmagan, Slash Pairings > McKay/Sheppard
Characters: Carson Beckett, John Sheppard, Rodney McKay, Teyla Emmagan
Genres: Episode Related
Warnings: None
Chapters: 1 [Table of Contents]
Series: None

Word count: 2506; Completed: Yes
Updated: 21 Oct 2007; Published: 21 Oct 2007
Reviewer: Ciar (Signed)
28 Jan 2008
Oh, if only it had really happened this way *sigh*. This was brilliant, I really enjoyed it. Great character exploration and the voices were spot on :)
Chapter 1: Chapter 1

Summary: Sometimes, not knowing isn't an excuse. And sometimes, when you've gotten your heart's desire, you can't give it up, no matter what.

Categories: Slash Pairings > McKay/Sheppard
Characters: John Sheppard, Rodney McKay
Genres: Angst, AU - Alternate Universe, Episode Related
Warnings: Adult themes
Chapters: 1 [Table of Contents]
Series: None

Word count: 1798; Completed: Yes
Updated: 05 Nov 2007; Published: 04 Nov 2007
Reviewer: Ciar (Signed)
05 Jan 2008
I really like this. I think your subtle characterisation of the doppelganger Sheppard is very credible. I can also see his initial logic in trying to consolidate his position by making McKay pliable and loyal to him, by giving McKay what he secretly wants. Rodney on his side is his best chance of success for achieving his ends. However, I also like the fact that in so doing the doppelganger Sheppard is attracted to, and possessive of, McKay in turn.



So the crystal that the doppelganger brings back from his home planet and that he spends so much time with in the lab - does it contain the real Sheppard's consciousness? Is the doppelganger spending time in the lab tormenting the real Sheppard? Just curious to know :)
Chapter 1: The Ceremony Of Innocence Is Drowned
Home by rizzo [NC-17]
[Reviews - 7]

Summary: John's never been too sure of his place in the universe to begin with...

Categories: Slash Pairings > McKay/Sheppard
Characters: John Sheppard, Rodney McKay
Genres: Challenge, Character Study, Drama
Warnings: None
Chapters: 1 [Table of Contents]
Series: None

Word count: 1293; Completed: Yes
Updated: 12 Nov 2007; Published: 12 Nov 2007
Reviewer: Ciar (Signed)
06 Feb 2008
That was just beautiful to read. I love to read fics from John's POV that show him gradually falling in love with Rodney. John realising how he felt and searching out Rodney at the end was just perfect
Chapter 1: Chapter 1

Summary: While on a mission with another team, Rodney is kidnapped by an old enemy leaving John in a desperate scramble to find him before it's too late.

Spoilers through 2x06 Trinity, AU after that.

Categories: Slash Pairings > McKay/Sheppard
Characters: Carson Beckett, Elizabeth Weir, John Sheppard, Major Lorne, Radek Zelenka, Rodney McKay, Ronon Dex, Teyla Emmagan
Genres: Angst, Drama, Episode Related, First Time, Hurt Comfort, Romance
Warnings: None
Chapters: 13 [Table of Contents]
Series: None

Word count: 20528; Completed: Yes
Updated: 10 Aug 2008; Published: 04 Dec 2007
Reviewer: Ciar (Signed)
06 Feb 2008
This was just a wonderful story, I really enjoyed reading it. It contained just the right proportions of drama, angst and sweetness. This is definitely one of the best amnesia fics I've read :)

Author's Response: Thank you so much! That was a wonderful compliment.
Chapter 1: Prologue

Summary: Rodney's business trip is interrupted by visitors.

Updated: 11 Dec 2007; Published: 09 Dec 2007
Reviewer: Ciar (Signed)
30 Jan 2008
I LOVE your Tragic Woobie Widower series and I'm so glad to read another installment :) This was just lovely and I really enjoyed it. My heart just melted to see Rodney so proud of his new partner; to see John and Timmy together, both getting on well as usual, and to see John missing Rodney so much that he came to Colorado to spend time with him. Wonderful!!

Author's Response: Hi! I\'m really late here but thank you very much!
Chapter 1: Chapter 1

Summary: Rodney's had a rough day, luckily John can make it better...

Categories: Slash Pairings > McKay/Sheppard
Characters: None
Genres: Established Relationship, PWP - Plot, What Plot?
Warnings: None
Chapters: 1 [Table of Contents]
Series: None

Word count: 1826; Completed: Yes
Updated: 14 Dec 2007; Published: 14 Dec 2007
Reviewer: Ciar (Signed)
30 Jan 2008
Oh that was a nice story. It was a great balance of PWP with emotional aspects. I need to go and sit in the corner now and have a wee cool down after reading it :)

Author's Response: :) Thank you - I\'m so glad you liked it! cep xxx
Chapter 1: Chapter 1

Summary: John worries that Rodney is going to break up with him and so has a little chat with Jeannie about what could have his boyfriend all in a tizz.

Categories: Slash Pairings > McKay/Sheppard
Characters: John Sheppard, Other, Rodney McKay
Genres: Episode Related, Established Relationship
Warnings: None
Chapters: 1 [Table of Contents]
Series: None

Word count: 3148; Completed: Yes
Updated: 18 Dec 2007; Published: 18 Dec 2007
Reviewer: Ciar (Signed)
18 Dec 2007
I think this story is touching and really well written.

I love the fact that John finally got to tell someone all the reasons he loves Rodney, I was also really happy that through this story the reader gets to see in some detail what these were - your John's reasons are fairly spot on to me :)

I think most of all I loved the pacing of the story and the small details such as John's hands gripping the kitchen worktop when he realised what it was that Jeannie had said to bother Rodney. This small detail shows the depth of feeling John has for Rodney and that he knows his lover well enough to judge the effect of what was said on Rodney's psyche.

I also liked the fact that even though John was worried that Rodney would break up with him, he wasn't going to just let it happen - he was prepared to put up a fight, and that's what I like to see. I like to see Rodney and John fighting for their relationship.

I am also glad that Rodney got to hear what John had to say about him - that's a really sweet part of the story. Also sweet is the fact that John changes from being relatively eloquent when talking about his feelings for Rodney with Jeannie, to being to his usual verbally hesitant self once Rodney appears in the room. It just strikes me as being so in character and well noticed/described on your part.
Chapter 1: Chapter 1

Summary: Rodney wonders why it is that he hasn't started to anticipate this particular mission outcome yet. You'd think that after nigh on three years of living in Pegasus, he'd have started to recognise the trend. Because, with hindsight, it is blindingly obvious that they would get stranded on Planet Ice Age during a snow storm.

Categories: Slash Pairings > McKay/Sheppard
Characters: None
Genres: First Time
Warnings: None
Chapters: 1 [Table of Contents]
Series: None

Word count: 9933; Completed: Yes
Updated: 19 Dec 2007; Published: 19 Dec 2007
Reviewer: Ciar (Signed)
30 Jan 2008
Mmmmmm this was a lovely story to read - beautifully written and so easy to loose myself in for a little while. Really clever plot, spot-on characterisation, with lovely angst and romance elements too. Yummy!

Author's Response: Thank you - the fleece is inspirational! :) cep xxx
Chapter 1: Chapter 1

Summary: Written for leyenn in response to her request as part of the SGA Secret Santa fic exchange. She asked for "McKay/Sheppard as an established relationship prior to going to Atlantis. Bonus points for fitting it into canon as much as possible, cherry on top for someone/everyone/Atlantis finding out about their relationship. I love angst and an eventual happy ending." Well, I tried my best to fulfill all of these criteria!

Categories: Slash Pairings > McKay/Sheppard
Characters: Elizabeth Weir, John Sheppard, Rodney McKay, Samantha Carter
Genres: Character Study, Established Relationship, First Time, Romance
Warnings: None
Chapters: 1 [Table of Contents]
Series: None

Word count: 14326; Completed: Yes
Updated: 02 Jan 2008; Published: 01 Jan 2008
Reviewer: Ciar (Signed)
12 Jan 2008
I loved their meeting and the instant interest they generated in each other. I preferred that the first evening they spent together they just watched telly together and ate popcorn. It was so sweet and very in character!

I loved that they kept in touch based on their one meeting and that Rodney's letters kept John sane during the war. I loved how Rodney used his connections in the USAF to get his letters to John on time and that he sent things to keep John from being bored in Afghanistan. I really enjoyed seeing them get to know each other through their correspondence and how they came to mean so much to each other so quickly.

Rodney showing up at Petersen to collect John on his return to the States was just great - I love seeing Rodney taking the initiative in stories. The worry that John was going to deny his feelings for Rodney when they almost kissed in the hall was really effective - I'm so glad that John finally gave in and took something good for himself.

Them keeping their relationship on the QT for such a long time was so touching and wonderfully described and dealt with. I was so pleased when for once in his life John decided he had something for himself worth fighting for and that he wasn't going to give up on him and Rodney. The way John showed his relationship with Rodney in Elizabeth's office was so in character and so touching!!!

I loved the structure of the story, the chronological flashbacks interspersed with the current Atlantis situation were very well done. I also loved how the flashbacks fitted in with the realisations they were having about each other in Atlantis - how they realised they couldn't live without each other and had known it for a long time was brilliantly described through each flashback event.

Rodney counting their relationship as starting from Afghanistan (and John feeling the same way) was just so lovely.

Great story, beautifully written!! I loved reading it!!

Author's Response: Thank you so much for your detailed comments! I did a lot of research for this story, so it is lovely to hear that you enjoyed it so much! To hear that the structure worked is wonderful and I\'m so glad that you found the whole storyline believable and thought that the boys were in character. This, and the fact that you loved reading it, is pretty much the best feedback I could ask for! :) cep xxx
Chapter 1: Chapter 1
You and Me by Ionaonie [PG-13]
[Reviews - 9]

Summary: After getting back from staying at Jeannie's, Rodney find Sheppard not doing so well. He gets to the bottom of it.

Spoilers for McKay and Mrs Miller, Lifeline, Doppelganger, Miller's Crossing.



Categories: Slash Pairings > McKay/Sheppard
Characters: John Sheppard, Rodney McKay
Genres: Episode Related, Established Relationship
Warnings: None
Chapters: 1 [Table of Contents]
Series: None

Word count: 2759; Completed: Yes
Updated: 05 Jan 2008; Published: 05 Jan 2008
Reviewer: Ciar (Signed)
07 Jan 2008
I really enjoyed reading this!



Your characterisation of Rodney and John was so perfect from body language to speech. This was a great analysis of events in Miller's Crossing. You captured, and explained, the anguish and emotion in the looks the John and Rodney were giving each other in that ep.
Chapter 1: Chapter 1

Summary: If only Rodney had some control of his higher functions, he would certainly let Lieutenant Colonel Of-Course-You-Want-Me-Everybody-Wants-Me know just how much the leaning and the smelling incredible and the looking hot were so not helping to ease his terror.

Categories: Slash Pairings > McKay/Sheppard
Characters: John Sheppard, Rodney McKay
Genres: First Time
Warnings: None
Chapters: 1 [Table of Contents]
Series: None

Word count: 2131; Completed: Yes
Updated: 15 Jan 2008; Published: 15 Jan 2008
Reviewer: Ciar (Signed)
24 Jan 2008
Gosh that was an amazing character study. I love clueless Rodney and his not understanding why he does so many amazing things for John. I love John finally realising what there is between them and deciding to act on it. The moment where it feels like John will be disappointed by Rodney turning him down was so sad and sweetly written. John Sheppard coming on to Rodney is hot!! On the whole there is nothing about this story that I don't like - lots!! Please may we have some more???

Author's Response: Thank you so much for your kind comments! I think both of the guys might be a bit slow on the uptake when it comes to Romance, but that just makes the moment of truth more delicious. I\'m so glad that you liked the story. It was my first stab at SGA but not my last. Thanks again.
Chapter 1: Fear Struck