24 Jun 2005
Okay, I'm female, 32 and live in Leicester, UK. Big fan of sci-fi in general and obviously Atlantis :). I'm also a huge slash fan. I'll read anyone with Sheppard...does that make me a Shepslut? I particularly like John/Carson and John/Rodney, and better yet John/Carson/Rodney mmmmm. Edited to add Radek...John/Radek or John/Radek in a threesome (or even foursome) with Carson or Rodney *vbg*.
Oh, and Lorne, as well ;).
Post Siege III fic. After the fighting is all over, John still feels unsettled.
Updated: 19 Aug 2005; Published: 19 Aug 2005
It was rather sad to see them both so lost, so it was great when they found a way to anchor themselves. I liked the way that first kiss was almost accidental, but how the rest of it really wasn't :). What it was was hot *g*. I also loved the uncertainty they both had over the other wanting them, and how they convinced each other that it was true. I liked John's thoughts as they stopped flying about his head once Rodney grounded him, and the same for Rodney's desperate need to be working getting beaten down by Rodney's need for John instead. This was very sweet and tender as well as hot. Very nice. Laura.
Author's Response: Thank you! I told myself I wasn't going to write a post-Siege fic, but then, I just couldn't resist. I love the idea that when their emotional defenses are completely wiped out, they find themselves kissing. *g* I like think they do find strength in each other, even when they're arguing about stuff.
Chapter 1: His Place In the Universe
Sheppard wants to know why he needed to make it an order.
Updated: 19 Aug 2005; Published: 19 Aug 2005
Wow, this is really hot. I love dom!John. It's really hot that someone as physically imposing and dangerous as Dex is willing to give up control to someone who's deserving of his trust, and that he's decided John fits the bill. There's some nice character insights amongst all the hotness; I liked Ronon's observations about John, how he leads softly for the most part, but the cold steel is there nonetheless. As for John, I liked his musings on Ronon's past and his certainty that he was going to hell for this, but couldn't stop anyway. Excellent stuff and I hope to see more of this pairing from you. Laura.
Author's Response: Thank you so much for your kind review. I am happy that the caracterization worked for you. I hope I can write more as well.
This was not how it was supposed to happen. Carson and John talk. Poisoning the Well tag.
Updated: 19 Aug 2005; Published: 19 Aug 2005
Yes, there needs to be more John/Carson...even in a non-slashy way *g*. This was nicely done. It's good to see Carson dealing with the loss of Perna, and having a little help from John. The episode deserved it, but tv often hits the reset button and all ain and hurt is miraculously gone by the next episode. i'm pleased you did it for us instead :). Laura.
Everybody hurts...even John Sheppard, as much as he keeps it on the inside. Warning - bad language / disturbing theme.
Updated: 21 Aug 2005; Published: 19 Aug 2005
Ooo, broken!John! Probably I'm quite mean, but I like fics that torment John, he suffers well...just as long as he's fixed by the end, preferably. See? I'm not *all* mean :). That stuff about his father was particularly shocking because it was new, I at least expected Mitch and Dex to crop up, but that? Just...OMG! I really hope someone comes to check on him; Carson or Rodne would be my choice. Elizabeth's already had her go and failed, and Bates or Ford probably wouldn't be able to get through to him. I'm off to read the next chapter now, hoping John gets a little help. Laura.
Chapter 1: Everybody Hurts, John
Okay, Rodney nows that there's something troubling John. Fingers crossed he's not going to let John get away without seeing Carson. It'd be even better if he can get John to talk to him, even if it's just a little. Laura.
Chapter 2: The First Cut Is The Deepest
*Meep* Thank God Rodney and Teyla's conversation got Rodney thinking and sent him to John's quarters. I'm pleased John's going to get medical care now, but I'm also worried about how it will affect him to learn that people know about him. I hope they'll have the sense to keep this under wraps and only tell those who really need to know, which luckily are the same people that he calls friends. I hope they will help him through this. Please tell me you will be updating soon, I'm on the edge of my seat! Laura.
Chapter 3: Quit Bugging Me
Oh, John :(. I'm glad Carson managed to stabilise him from the neck wounds; I just hope he has the same luck with John's mind. At least he'll have help for that part. Poor Rodney and Elizabeth, having to be sedated too. I liked Ruth; it's good that she'll be so keen to help John and keep things quiet at the same time. Loved Carson's last speech to John, it was very moving ::sniff::. Laura.
Chapter 4: When You’re Looking Like That
I'm glad John's woken up, even if it does mean he's closer to having to deal. I liked Aiden's words, wondering how much of what little John has revealed about himself is true. It's a much deeper thought than I would typically associate with Ford, but I'm happy to be proven wrong in my view of him. Laura.
Chapter 5: Do I Know You At All?
Poor Rodney :(. I'm glad Carson has convinced John to talk to him about this. I'm surprised at Teyla though, shocked and upset too, but as Carson said- it's her loss. Laura.
I hope Elizabeth doesn't make things worse with her cotton wool wrapping tendencies. I was glad that Aiden and Rodney had already thought to go through John's quarters. I'm wondering who's at the door now. Laura.
Excellent chapter. I had been looking forward to John and Rodney's initial talk. I really felt all the things Rodney was feeling. I'm glad he got a little information from John about this, and also managed to talk through some of his own pain. The ending, when he got back to his own room, was very powerful, as was his speech to John about how much everyone needs him, and how much Rodney appreciates that John sees past his walls when no one else even tries. Laura.
I really am impressed with how you're writing this. The emotions are all so real and believable. If this carries on, they'll each be able to add their little bit of information to the puzzle until the picture's complete. And now Elizabeth's actually witnessed one of his halucinations, they'll have a better idea of what to look out for. Laura.
Again I say: Poor Rodney. Everyone seems to keep forgetting how hard he's taking this. I had a brief sense of satisfaction at Carson and Elizabeth's startlement when Rodney told them about John's "Carson should have let me die". Rodney's been dealing with that knowledge on top of everything else, and I think he's entitled to be a bit off centre. So I was just briefly pleased that he caught them off guard after they seemed so uncaring of his own problems. I was happy to see the number of Athosians who haven't given up on John...I even hoped they might get Teyla to join in for a minute after seeing her realisation that she had abandoned John when he most needed her. I was sad to see her running instead, but maybe there's a little hope now, at least. Laura.
Oh, Carson :(. I know he's tired and overworked, but I just had a feeling that his little outburst would push John too far. I'm glad he realised that and went back. I hope he can save John and also not dwell on any feelings of guilt; guilt won't help John. His message was sad, and so similar to what Carson had ben thinking on his way back to John. Laura.
I'm glad John's still with us, even if he isn't. I hope someone realises about the restraints soon, it's not going to do John any good if he's having more memories pushed on him. I'm glad Rodney's with him, and hope that he pulls through this too. Laura.
This was an interesting chapter with the different and distinct pov's. I thought you caught Aiden's mix of youthful enthusiasm and bewildered struggle at being in charge. I'm glad to hear that Teyla's been found. Elizabeth's little bit was good too, just sitting like she always does. As for Carson, I really hope that he figures out soon that it'snot the drugs but the restraints that are causing John's current state. And Rodney. That was sad. It's so obviously taking a massive toll on him and I'm glad that he's managed to vent some of his anger, even if he did say some harsh stuff. It seems like he might have gotten through to John too. I just hope he's not truly given up on their friendship and it was just his anger talking. Laura.
Oh dear, Carson was too late figuring stuff out and now it's bound to make his job much harder if John doesn't trust him. I had another bout of guilty satisfaction as Carson began doubting himself- it's a littl late for that! But I'm hoping he can get past it and get John to let him near again. I was also pleased to see Ryth so firmly on John's side, disagreeing with Carson's treatment and giving John freedom to take a shower on his own. It's just what he needs right now. Laura.
Chapter 14: When The Trust Has Gone
Two "Yay"'s for this chapter. 1) Yay, Teyla's finally gone to see John and 2) Yay, John's finally told someone how this all started. I'm kind of glad that Teyla was the one to hear it, she needed to understand how to reconcile this with her beliefs and now sha has a better understanding of the cause, I hope she will be able to continue supporting John. Laura.
Chapter 15: Listening Without Prejudice
Ah, Radek is such a genius. The book is a great idea, I hope John uses it. I'm glad Radek hacked John's files, it's good that someone else knows what happened and also means John can be sure that Teyla hasn't told. It was good to see a little of the old John snark too :). Laura.
Wow, I wasn't expecting Bates to be the one to speak to Elizabeth. I know he was mostly concerned for the security of Atlantis, but it was great to see some genuine concern for John, considering how they get on. I hope seeing Kate doesn't cause too many problems, and I also hope John gets this thing with Carson cleared up. I'd like him to talk to Rodney too, after that last time. But, yay, he's getting to fly again. That can only improve things :). Laura.